Geoff (bandgeekaltosax) wrote in atheist_debate,

I hope that this is a Joke

Christian Debate Techniques 101

How to reason with non-believers
Don’t get engaged in a discussion about issues, logic or evidence. That is a satanic ploy. Instead, follow the techniques outlined below, and you can claim victory in the crusade against the godless. All good Christians should learn by heart the good and wholesome sentences below.

Strategy 1: I feel really sorry for you!
Remember that no matter what you do, as a Christian you are a Better Person than the non-believer. Therefore, you must pity them. Also, it is obvious that the only reason people don’t believe in Christ is because they need an excuse to live licentious and immoral lives. Atheists claim they disbelieve because they have seen no evidence. That is a lie.

1) “I will pray for you.”

2) “Jesus loves you!”

3) “God loves you!”

4) “I feel sorry for you.”

5) “There must be some other reason that you are saying ‘no’ to God’s love.”

6) “But Jesus/God still loves you!”

Strategy 2: But Atheism is a Religion, Too.
It is obvious to all who have seen The Truth that to not believe in a religion is the same as believing in one.

7) “You have to believe in SOMETHING!”

8) “Everybody worships something.”

9) “It requires more faith to not believe in God, than it does to believe in one.”

10) “I wished I had as strong faith in God as you have in atheism (or, evolution.”

11) “You only believe that you are happy. But you can only find True Happiness through Jesus!”

Strategy 3: The Moral High Ground
Obviously, when the filthy atheists don’t accept the strong and logical arguments we have outlined above, it must be because they are morally filthy and corrupt.

12) “It is obvious you have already made up your mind, so I don’t want to waste my time arguing with you.”

13) “You have chosen to be blind to The TRUTH.”

14) “You have been fooled by the Devil.”

15) “Something must have happened that has made you bitter and angry on God.”

16) “I have met Jesus, so why can’t you?”

17) “Only the fool says in his heart there is no god.”

18) “You are running away from God.”

19) “You are hiding from The TRUTH.”

Strategy 4: “What’s wrong with you?”
Since the FACT about God and Jesus is so obvious to us believers, there must be something wrong with non-believers who don’t accept the obvious TRUTH.

20) “If there is no God, how can you explain the world we live in?”

21) “What has happened in your life to make you hate God?”

22) “Of course the Bible seems strange to non-believers. But if you had God’s Holy Spirit you would understand its wisdom.”

23) “Even if you don’t believe it, JESUS LOVES YOU!”

24) “Even if you don’t believe it, GOD EXISTS!”

Strategy 5: “Your life has no meaning!”
Remember to make non-believers understand that without belief in God and Jesus, their lives are meaningless.

25) “Without God we are alone in the world.”

26) “A universe without God is a universe without hope.”

27) “Without God, life is meaningless.”

28) “Christianity is not only the best answer, but the ONLY answer.”

29) “You use your life on something negative (atheism) instead of using it POSITIVELY (Christianity).”

Strategy 6: “Just you wait…”
If you still can’t make the unbelievers repent, make them realize that one day they will see the truth about Jesus. All it takes is some personal crisis, and they will find Jesus.

30) “Just wait, one day you will find God.”

31) “One day you will cry out for God to help you!”

32) “If you just believe, God will become real to you.”

33) “I was like you one day, and didn’t believe in God, but then…”

Strategy 7: God will kill you if you don’t believe!
This is the last chance. By using obvious or not-so-obvious threats of destruction or hell, you can win any debate.

34) “One day you will realize that Jesus is your only salvation.”

35) “One day you’ll know I was right, but THEN IT WILL BE TOO LATE!”

36) “Find God before it is too late!”

37) “You better wear flame-resistant clothes if you continue being an atheist!”
  • Post a new comment


    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded